*Disclaimer: The author here is Jason. The second paragraph gets a little mathy. It is relevant. However, for those of you that balk at it, the rest of the post has a distinctly personal vibe and shame on you for dismissing math. Also, I am partially sorry for the unattended and intended pregnancy puns.
It is 3 or 2 days after the due date depending on who you ask. At our 20 week sonogram, the ultrasound tech told us July 6th, which happens to be our niece Nadia's birthday. While just two weeks ago, our midwife told us that there records have always shown our due date being the 7th. In our minds it will always be the 6th and our baby boy is now officially (Chelsea being my go to official) "not punctual". However, the concept of a due date is a joke.
It is calculated by adding 40 weeks to the end of the mothers last period, completely disregarding the day of conception. At our last last appointment, our Midwife, Ellie, tells us that actually the average white first-time mother gives birth at 41 weeks. Of course, I have to ask what the standard deviation is, inducing an eye-roll from Chelsea. Ellie's answer? 2 weeks! Further exasperating the joke. Essentially, what that means is that if you assume the pregnancy lengths to be on a standard bell curve there was roughly a 2% chance of meeting our boy on the original due date and only a 17% chance he comes within a week of it. The chance is better to be within a week of our revised date at barely 20%, but the improvement is not by much. Seriously, for the next kid we are just going to ask for a due month.
The extra week not being reflected in our original due date, the date given us should have been the 13th or 14th of July. Disregarding other factors (Chelsea's discomfort, our want to meet him, the dwindling options to distract us from the wait, etc.), the new date would provide for a less crowded calendar of celebrations for our family. Chelsea's birthday is the 1st, our wedding anniversary is the 31st and that's topped off with the 4th, Nadia's birthday on the 6th, and her father's birthday on the 9th. Pushing back the upcoming birthday would make the rest a little more special.
But in all sincerity, I just feel bad for Chelsea. She has shared her body long enough and has labored through the various discomforts, inconveniences, and annoyances with amazing patience and grace. She has suffered through nausea, back pain, restless nights, migraines and a hyper-active boy who pokes, prods, jabs, and generally abuses her from the inside. We know the excessive movement is probably a good thing, but the internal "fluttering" sensations that initially peaked my jealousy and curiosity now appear so awkward and uncomfortable that I consider myself fortunate to simply feel, from the outside, his heels drag across her abdomen wall. Add to that the frequent flier miles racked up by trips to the bathroom, an abundance of redundantly inopportune appointments, and strangers and loved ones being unable to resist the urge to comment on her body, giving future nurturing advice or prognostications, or reminding her that the baby has not come yet while she is desperately trying to think about anything but that. As most fathers and mothers I'm sure would agree, the whole situation is drastically lopsided and unfair in favor of me.
On the bright side, it has been great to spend time with Chelsea before the baby comes. Since getting out for the summer, I have been able to prepare us for him to come. With Chelsea taking the holiday week off in hopes of resting before the real work begins, we have been able to spend some good time together rather than bustling about. We have been to a different beach every other day to read, relax, get some sun, and cool off in the water. We also went to our first drive-in together and watched the Despicable Me and Monsters, Inc sequels. We've slept in, gone walking, played cards, watched movies, and simply talked. Yesterday, we picked up a Wii game from the library and today, to make good on a promise I made, Chelsea is going to "do" my nails. I've offered my kid his first bribe to get me out of it. Kidding.
So, it's the 9th of July and we're still ready and waiting and eager to meet him. The support and generosity we have received from friends and family has us feeling as prepared as we possibly could be. I'm not nearly as naive as I could have been. Special thanks go to Sue and Ray, my dad, Sarah and Jeremy, Christina, Jeff, Elisha, Steph, Martha, and Erin. Now, I'm going to return to Chelsea and daydreaming about holding my son while we watch his first All-Star Game or strolling around with the other fathers and offspring of the Daddy Boot Camp Club.
Thank you Chelsea for being so supportive in my personal projects and pursuits that have taken more time than I have anticipated.
Love you all.
Jason
*Keep an eye on your emails for the announcement for which you are all pregnant with anticipation.
